Dear Customer Service Rep…

I bought a TV & TV stand this week…. one from a Department Store, the other from a Big Box store.

Dear Customer Service Person: (in person)
I am truly sorry you hate your job. I am sorry you feel a need to pretend you are busy. I am sorry you were raised by wolves & don’t know to look up when I walk in or say hello when I am standing directly in front of  you.
I am thinking:
I would rather poke myself in the eye than deal with you.
Your behaviour is shameful . Do your employer a good turn & quit this job.
Go find a job that will make you happy & that will make you feel like being a company asset.

Dear Service Rep (on the phone),
I know your company wants to sell me warranties…THEN you could do something for me. I am sorry I just bought this product in the last few days & you feel no accountability to help me with my questions concerning it. You recommended I call the actual store I bought from…so, I did….they have NEVER bothered to call me back.
I am thinking:
Are you freaking kidding me? You can’t help me with a question concerning a new purchase? How can you take my payment in full & feel no necessity to help? Your head office blew me off, the actual store of the purchase couldn’t take the time to call me back.

My money was not well spent with you.

Dear Manufacturers Service Rep (on phone)
I am sorry you are frustrated by me. I am trying to explain my problem as carefully as I can. I am also sorry I don’t know as much about your product, as you do, . If I did, I would most likely not need to put us both through this painful phone session.I am not an unintelligent person, yet you make me feel like I am unintelligent.And when I ask you to transfer me to someone with more experience in the area I am asking about, you say you can’t transfer me …… I will need to call back.
I am thinking:
I have purchased your product & because I can’t get any help from the vendor, I am asking for your help … you assh*le!
Are you not supposed to be the expert that knows about your companies products?  Your best suggestion is to keep calling back until I get someone who understands my problem. You are a total dick.

WTF kind of help is that! ?

Dear Customer Service Rep (on live chat on-line)
I am sorry you cannot call me from your location ….your cautious but remote typing feels impersonal….although your responses are carefully  prepared & obviously from a list of possible answers….. that enable you to do nothing for me.
At least your typing sounds polite.
I am thinking: If you can’t advise or help me….who can?

End Result:

I fixed my own problems with help from staff & friends
…. without any help from the businesses that should have understood they have some accountability in the matter.

I feel good because the problems are fixed.

I feel bad because I spent hard earned money on household products with companies who really don’t give a flying f*ck  about me, their reputation, their product or my continued patronage.

So…

Dear Department & Big Box stores & Manufacturer Service Reps:

I’ll bet when your company first opened, customer service was truly important to you
……but now you politely tell us to get lost… trivialise our problems & questions … make us solve your products  problems, ourselves…. pass us off to another department to ditch us…. ask us to buy warranties on products newly purchased., in order to get any service… you put us on hold ….  sometimes you put us on forget … or treat us rudely in person.

Shame on you.

Wanna know what product manufacturer & Department Store I will never shop again?

Dear Blog Reader:
thank-you for holding, your questions are important to us! The next available customer service representative will be right with you….

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